Really?

My first topic today has to do with the abuse of technology. Just because we are able to do something does not mean that we should. Question: Is it ever necessary to leave a voice mail stating, "It's me. Call me back."? Answer: No!!! It's not as though we need prompting to do the obvious thing. We're not dogs. We don't need simple commands to get through everyday life. Right now, as I type this, I happen to be listening to a voice mail that goes something like this: "Hey. Just wanted to chat. Call me when you get a chance." Really? Really? I guess this wouldn't be so bad if, to get to the message in the first place, I didn't have to listen to the robotic, semi-British voice mail lady ask me to enter my code and then tell me how many new messages I have, what day they were sent and at exactly what time they were sent! (As though this information cannot be found in my call log. Come on!) So, rambling aside, voice mail is meant for important subjects. There is no need to leave a message every single time you have the opportunity. Remember this fact and I promise people will like you better.


While we're on the subject of things that annoy the hell out of me, let's talk about restaurants. There are so many things that are bothersome about restaurants, but today I am going to focus on restaurants that list items on the menu that are not actually available. Now, don't get me wrong, I understand the premise of seasonal items and that in a few cases an update has simply not occurred yet, but there is no need to list items on the menu that we all know are not going to be available ever. Example #1: there is a certain pizza by the slice place that has many items on the menu, but only has about 1/3 of those items available on a regular basis. Example #2: there is an Applebee's in a certain town that has a Key Lime dessert shooter on its menu, however, this particular shooter is never available. I mean, Really?


My last thought of the day takes us to driving, this is a subject I tend to get a little over-excited about, so I'll try to control myself. Question: Why do people insist on getting into the turn lane at the last possible minute? Answer: Most people are idiots, and getting behind the wheel of a car only seems to intensify this characteristic in most people. It's a well known fact that I have what some people like to refer to as 'Road Rage.' I like to call it "I'm just a better driver than you." When I get behind the wheel of a car; my life motto, "If I don't teach them, who will?" kicks into overdrive. Call me crazy, but I strongly believe that the quickest way to teach someone a lesson is by endangering their life with heavy machinery, i.e. a motor vehicle. Don't believe me? Try it yourself: Next time you are driving along at a nice pace until the a**hole in front of you slows down to 15mph and then gets in the turn lane, simply get so close to their bumper that when they look in the rear view mirror, an expression of pure terror floods into their face momentarily. Of course, you have to be prepared for the inevitable explicit hand gesture, but at least you will have the sweet satisfaction of knowing that one d-bag will think twice about the appropriate use of a turn lane next time!

You're Welcome.
Stone